Sunday, June 1, 2008

is it funny that the kamikaze bugs in my apartment are japanese beetles?

My apartment has been invaded. I don't know what it is, but I'm kind of freaking out a little bit. It started earlier this week. Thankfully, so far we haven't seen in waterbugs, which is normally the kind of bug we see, this being the beach and all. Those things are awful, because they're gigantic and they're so fast it's hard to squish them (when we have boys around to do so, or Alicia since she's the house mommy) and sometimes they fly, which is absolutely panic-inducing.

That said, the bugs that have been getting in are pretty awful. As far as I can tell, they're coming in through the sliding glass door that we leave open while we're hanging out downstairs at night. Since it's about 300 degrees inside and a little cooler outside. Well, the first night we noticed them--they're Japanese beetles, by the way, which is weird on its own--we had everyone over, hanging out and watching a movie (this crazy intense movie called Death Sentence with Kevin Bacon, go watch it if you like gang hit movies--I cried about eleven times in the first few minutes, but it was good for that kind of movie) and I was all curled up in the recliner with a blanket. Well, after most everyone had left, being thoroughly traumatized by the movie, I was just kind of shuffling around the living room with the blanket still wrapped around me when I looked down near where I was holding it and one of those nasty things was attached! At that point I kind of did one of those cat-leaps and slung the blanket across the room and slung myself to the other side.

Well, the next night we had a bunch of people over again for the roommates' going away party, and the front and back door were wide open. We were playing Mario Kart Wii (woo!) and apparently the bugs had gotten in again because they started kamikaze-ing us, dive-bombing our heads and we'd knock them away. After all the Mario Kart, we all piled on the couches to watch (the greatest movie ever) Independence Day, and my leg started itching. Now, keep in mind that I was wearing jeans, and they weren't skin tight, but they certainly weren't baggy. When I went to scratch the spot, there was something small and crunchy-ish between my pants and my leg. And I sort of knew then. It took everything in my not to tear off my pants right there, but I ran upstairs and wiggled out of them, and lo and behold! Japanese beetle in my pants! I still have no idea at all how it got there.

They got in last night too, swooping all around by the ceiling, nasty little kamikaze bugs. But we had another bug come out last night, besides the beetles. I was sitting on the couch, and all of a sudden Scott (my friend/roommate's boyfriend) comes flying over the back of it, man-roars, then absolutely destroys this massive spider that was on the wall beside my head about to bite me and kill me. Totally saved my life! I mean, he smashed that thing with is bare hands.

Actually, that's not exactly the way it happened. Really, there was a giant spider, and really, it almost killed me. But what happened was Scott said, "Sara. Behind you. On the wall. To your right." And again, I sort of knew. So I slowly turned around, saw the thing, and flew off the couch yelling SCOTTKILLIT SCOTTKILLIT SCOTTKILLIT! And he did, and it was terrifying.

And as of now, I've been finding dead Japanese beetles all over the living room and kitchen. And I'm pretty grossed out. But they weren't kidding about being kamikaze beetles.


All right, one last thing. Thanks to Scott for this link. It's an ad some women put in the paper. Yay for accidental sexual innuendos.


cheers.

6 comments:

nicolioliolio said...

um..that link is quite possibly the greatest thing EVER. hahahahaha literally just laughed out loud, a lot.

nicolioliolio said...

p.s. that absolutely terrifies me. cancel my visit. haha

sarawr said...

as for the link, scott gets all these really great ones from this extension of a gaming forum he's in. and lol, they're all as good as that one, i ought to start sending you the ones he sends me.

and nicole, you should be terrified. that spider was bigger than you.

Alicia said...

Cant open the link.. But the spider thing ahhh scarry! Did I ever tell you abou the time Nadia put her cheek on the lockers at school and when she had lifted it up we realized she smushed a spider with it and smeared it all on the side of her face... Yucky I think I would have died.

sarawr said...

Aw man, was it one of those massive Colombian jungle spiders? Or mountain spiders, I guess that was Bogota, right?

Lauri Jean Crowe said...

Too bad you killed the spider. It was no doubt killing your beetles for you! LOL!