Saturday, May 31, 2008

currently, my computer and i are fighting

Three things.

First: this is why I love the South. Also, I totally understand, because I have Vista and sometimes my computer and I argue. Although dude shot his, can't say my computer do anything more than throw each other around sometimes.

Second: best to Monica, who's flying to Germany tomorrow. And to Alicia, who's going ahead of us to Colombia tonight. Fly safely, both of you!

Third: it is freaking hot. Like, hot hot. As in, we're poor and don't run our air conditioner so we've got the door open and the fan going and it's about 107 degrees outside and it's still May but I took a shower and got out and then was sweating and it's just horrible and miserable and our apartment complex STILL has not opened the pool and really, I'd like to ask them to hang out in my house one day (or night - my sunburn finally started to peel because apparently I started sweating last night) so maybe they'll open it because it is a furnace and I am going to die.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

in accordance with my last post

i had a dream last night i was being chased by a serial killer with a mangled hand and a lame eye. lovely.

issues? maybe. excellent material for any future scripts i might want to write involving various ways of injuring/killing someone? definitely.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

old russian men are lovely, whatever you might say

Do you guys remember that week I had to go without Sundrop? Well, it wasn't so bad actually. The first morning after the first day I didn't have any, I had a headache and was just generally tired - that and I somewhat frequently thought about how much I really just wanted some. But no crazy withdrawals, nothing like that. Actually, at one point during the trip - or so I'm told - I started sleep talking. I said, "I don't see it." Pause. Then, "Oooh, now I see it." So, while I have no recollection of this, clearly I must have been dreaming about Sundrop.

Something you should know about this soda: it's not really distributed much outside eastern North Carolina. In fact, if you're not from here, you probably have no idea what drink I'm talking about and exactly how amazing it is. I can usually get it in the middle part of the state, but any farther away than that, I'm pretty much out of luck.

Well, on the way to Virginia, just before the border, we stopped to get gas. And of course since it was a gas station and I was already slightly panicky at the thought of not having Sundrop for a week, I decided I was going to at least try and see if they had some. One last bottle before we actually got to camp. I looked through the giant fridge things and didn't see any, but I refused to give up, and so I went up to the register, and this is what happened.

"Excuse me," I said. "You guys don't happen to have any Sundrop, do you?"

"No," the guy said. He had a Russian accent, which surprised me and was wonderful since I love Russians. "But I can make you some."

I think I was kind of smiling at him and his accent. "Oh yeah?"

"I'll take the sun and put it in a cup. Just for you."

When I walked out, it was without any Sundrop, but there was something else sunny inside me.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

i hope the universe isn't trying to tell me something

it seems for the past 3 weeks or so, basically since i got home, i've had a few seriously bad dreams. i hesitate to call them nightmares because i didn't wake up in a sweat, nor screaming or crying, as some have had me doing in the past. so, these were bad, but not as bad as some others.

the two worst that stand out, and i write this now as i just had the one last night, were when i was shot and stabbed.

the one of me being shot happened the first week i was home. this kid who was sort of what people might call a "dork" or "dweeb" was going around asking people to dance (and we weren't even at a dance, just in the hallway of some school), and i told him not right now but maybe later, and he said ok and left. well, as we are all leaving the school, he pulls up in his car, and says he has one more thing to do, and he pulls out a gun and shoots me point blank in the chest (more like lower left shoulder, but it's all in the same area). for the rest of the dream i was walking around putting pressure on the wound to stop from bleeding aimlessly trying to get to a hospital.

the stabbing dream from last night had me outside some college and this big shady guy in a beanie comes over and stabs a bunch of people including me in my right side (i guess you could say, in my love handle :-P ). i remember my reaction being delayed because i didn't feel the pain right away, i even asked the dude where he had stabbed me. i'm there with the supernatural boys, jensen and jared, although i was referring to them by their character names so it's really dean and sam. i'm in the school trying to stop from bleeding to death, then all of a sudden i'm being hunted down, not even by the stabber, but others who want to finish the job. so the cops show up, who are mysteriously the cast from without a trace (why the missing persons unit was called, idk), and i keep telling them to find dean for me, but he's nowhere to be found because him and sam decided to go hunting for my pursuers. next thing i know i'm in a basketball arena hiding, all the while still looking for dean. after that it all gets a bit blurry, as dreams tend to do, but i do remember at one point i was beating some guy up who found me but i could only use my one arm and leg because my right side was all in pain, and when dean found out later he was very impressed with me. so weird.

the only other significant bad dream i can also remember having recently was when i was lost on a dark and foggy night on the TCNJ campus with no one else around and no cell phone service to call cait and ask her which way to go. and for any of you who know, now THAT is scary. *shivers* that one might have bothered me more than the others...

i looked it up, just to be safe, and turns out dreams of getting attacked, injured, or even killed, does not mean it's some premonition or omen for your death or similar events in real life, just that there are things in your life right now you are scared of or worried about and this is your subconscious manifestation of that. these are also apparently very universal themes and dreams that people have, so that makes me feel a bit better. the only thing i don't understand is why i'd be having these now as opposed to before because my life is certainly much more carefree, stressfree, and easy breezy since school is over and i got out of that apartment hell-hole. but, i guess that's why it's my subconscious!

still though... what does it say that i keep having dreams where people want to kill me?

in case you were wondering what being horrified is like

The definition of horror is: hanging out at work telling one of your coworkers about the very cute dress you just got that made you think of her when she suddenly smacks your hips and says when'd you get these? But let me explain.

The coworker is definitely one of the prettiest in the office, and she's the kind you look at and can't believe has ever been pregnant, ever, because she's still shaped like you were freshman year of college. Only taller, and better at it. And ten years older than you were then.

You've gained about five pounds since February or so, which is fine, you're not fat at all, but you do tend to gain it in the hip/butt area (baby got back) so you're kind of self conscious about it already. Plus, that skirt you're wearing makes them look much larger than they actually are, just saying. And you were so excited this morning because you've turned a lovely shade of brown this weekend (hardly burned at all), you're starting to look ethnic again, so while skinny white girl works less for you now, dang. Just take it all away there. Wha-pow.

To be fair, she told you it was a compliment. To be fair, you look fine. But to be really fair, she smacked you near your butt like look at that thang! Had she yelled my, Sara, what a nicely-shaped bottom you have or have you started running again? or I hope my daughter grows up to have hips like yours, it might have been a little better. However, not the case for you.

And now you're shuffling down the hallway with your hands pressed against the sides of your legs and they all know. The coworker who's six months pregnant walks by with a knowing head nod that says they only get bigger from here.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

the office

Interesting factoid about me: I love office supplies. Incidentally, I work in an office. Even more incidentally, my office within the office is the office that holds the office supplies. It's kind of my dream to be given a shopping spree at a place like Office Max. In however many years, maybe I'll be teaching, maybe I won't, but either way, I'm going to have my own office, and it's going to have a large, overbearing desk. And in it and on it, I'm also going to have every type of office supply that was ever invented. All kinds of things I'll never actually use, and I'll probably never write on the desk, either, since I do most of that on beds or couches or somewhere actually comfortable.

So all that said, it's very hard for me not to steal supplies from the office I work at. We got in this massive shipment yesterday of supplies and let me just tell you: temptation is a stack of college-ruled notebooks as high as my head. In light blue, forest green with a hint of lime, and the ever-appropriate office-black. Oh man, and boxes of transparent tape. Like, not that supposedly transparent stuff that is more like frosted, I mean actually transparent. Imagine packing tape but in small dispensers. And more pens and pencils than I could ever use in a lifetime.

To be fair, if I actually took any of that stuff, I probably wouldn't use it. I just love having the supplies. I get notebooks for every gift holiday and I've yet to fill a single one up (though I've got most half-filled), but what I really like is just to open them and feel the paper. Or organize the supplies on my desk that I don't use and stand back admiringly and say: gosh I could do so much with these supplies. I could tape things! I could organize! I could write and write and the paper would feel smooth and new and wonderful!

(Whooo, that wasn't so bad. I've been thinking about writing a post for a week now and I finally have. Muchos gracias to Nicole for being amazing these last two weeks!!)


Thursday, May 22, 2008

harrison ford, marry me

so, just got back from seeing the new Indiana Jones movie, and let me tell you, harrison has STILL got it. (as if there was ever any doubt...shame on you who did!) he is as suave and charming as ever and better call me if things ever go south with calista.

the movie turned out to not be what i was expecting exactly, but i guess when you think about it it did follow basically the same pattern as the rest by having some other-worldy part play into it, and let me tell you, in this one, that is ESPECIALLY true. but i won't ruin anything for you. that's all i'm gonna say!

following in my dearly beloved harrison's footsteps, literally, is shia labeouf, who i might love just as much as harrison. he was also just as amazing and i will probably end up re-watching disturbia and transformers later just so i can have a little more shia in my life. expect big things from him, people! he's on his way to being the next harrison, though there, of course, could never be another <3.

in summation: harrison is still hot and kicking, shia is wonderful, and you need to go see the movie. (as if you weren't planning on it in the first place!) p.s. i know sara is going to incredibly agree with me on all of this. we're good like that. just ask about her tattoo :-p

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

karma is a-- well, you know.

as you may recall... a while back i had posted about how sucky and horrible the weather had been being in wilmington, that i later posted had done a complete 180º as it tends to and was suddenly absolutely gorgeous out. well, even though i did in some way take back what i had said in the first post with the second, i still think the damage was done...i had pissed off the weather gods.

in return, jersey has been nothing but cold, rainy, and dreary since i got here, after leaving the beautiful and warm climate of wilmington. how is this possible?! it is may! MAY! it's supposed to be spring in full bloom on its way to summer. it's about to be memorial day weekend for heaven's sake! and instead it is barely 60º in the "sun" and gets even colder at night.. we've had to have the heat going! absolutely ridiculous!

this has been bothering so because i'm worried it's starting to affect my mood...putting me in a constant state of doldrums and boredom as i have no desire to do anything in this terribleness. i think this is a legitimate something as i recall hearing about people in places like seattle or london where it rains more often than not. how depressing! it's supposed to be nicer for the rest of the week into the weekend, so we'll see how it goes. i've stopped listening to the meteorologists. i've decided they don't ever actually know what they're talking about.

so, just wanted to warn all of you not to make a similar mistake and complain about how crappy the weather might be because mother nature will take offense and start acting just like a-- well, you know.

after all, it can't rain forever. *starts singing* the sun'll come out tomorrow! (i hope)

Saturday, May 17, 2008

the garden state's finest... except not really

these people give jersey a bad name. (insert, bon jovi's "you give love a bad name" subbing in jersey for love, here)

i swear less than 5% of the population is like this. please don't judge us based on these faux-tan, guido, over-gelled, gotti wannabes.

it's a serious problem that i promise we are handling. (insert, "don't call us, we'll hit you" mafia ad, here)

sara may be smarter than all of us

i sat around for a reasonable amount of time last night without any pants on.

idk what it was about last night, but when i got back from seeing iron man with cait and melinda (AMAZING, btw, everyone go see it!) and after we had sat for an hour and a half in cait's car in my driveway talking about why boys are stupid, girls are stupid, and how just people in general are stupid, all i wanted to do was get into my room and take my pants off.

now, i was wearing jeans, so for any of you know who know me know that that's kind of a big deal, so it may have been that. but i think even if i had been wearing my usual casual, comfy pants, those would have just has quickly been stripped.

i never understood what sara meant when she spoke of the freedom of running around in your underwear, because certainly any body image issues and insecurities would restrict the joys of said supposed freedom, but i certainly took pleasure in spending 10 minutes standing in front of the tv in the living room trying to set up the VCR at 12am with the overhead light on, blinds up, and neighbor's similarly uncovered windows a few feet away.

as i'm always one to opt for comfort over appearance, after discovering just how much i in fact like running around with no pants on, i might opt to do so more often! sara and i always say we seem to be rubbing off on each other in various and interesting ways, so as far as this goes... well done, sara!

and to whomever may have stolen my pants... well, i say you can just go on ahead and keep them!

note: this post was especially in green :-)

Thursday, May 15, 2008

those 31 movies i need to see this summer...

i thought it might be nice for those of you who are absolutely stunned at the incredible number of films i keep mentioning if you knew which ones i was talking about, this way if you see them before me you can let me know what you thought or if i've seen them we can discuss! so, here they are, in no particular order:

  1. 88 minutes
  2. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
  3. Baby Mama
  4. Harold and Kumar: Escape from Guantanamo Bay
  5. Iron Man
  6. Made of Honor
  7. Speed Racer
  8. What Happens in Vegas
  9. Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
  10. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
  11. Sex and the City
  12. The Strangers
  13. The Happening
  14. Get Smart
  15. Wanted
  16. Hancock
  17. Hellboy 2
  18. The Dark Knight
  19. Mamma Mia!
  20. The X-Files
  21. Step Brothers
  22. American Teen
  23. The Mummy 3
  24. Midnight Meat Train
  25. He's Just Not That Into You
  26. Pineapple Express
  27. Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2
  28. Seventeen Again
  29. Tropic Thunder
  30. House Bunny
  31. The Accidental Husband
after this weeked i'll be 2 down, 29 to go! a few are already out and by the time i'd get around to seeing them they'll be pulled out of the theaters for the bigger blockbusters so i'll have to settle for those on DVD when they come out, or until they get to the lumina theater on campus. but, there's still going to be a record number i attend in the actual theater, no worries!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

two birds with one stone!

remember those things i wanted to accomplish this summer? two of things were 1. find a job so that i could afford to 2. see the ridiculously large number of movies i wanted to from now until august. well, my friends, it seems i have found an amazingly simple solution to this problem... working at the movie theater.

now, some of you may know that i actually ventured down this road way back in the winter of 2005, almost did the summer of '06, thought about it the summer of '07, and here i am once again, in the summer of '08, and it looks like it's ripping tickets and selling popcorn for me, again!

granted, the only legitimate time i worked there in said winter of '05, i did end up quitting hardly a month later, but that was during senior year of hs and things were crazy and the hours and frequency of those hours was certainly more than i could handle with a full schedule that included AP history with crazy Savage.

now, in the summer, when i desperately need the money to pay off what seems like my never-ending credit card bill and get to see all those damned movies that are calling my name to sit in the theater and spend 90-120 minutes of life watching, it will certainly be enough for me to handle. plus, i have nearly 2 years of crazy aramark concessions under my belt, along with 6 months of waitressing, and ask any waitress and she'll tell you that once you've done that, you can pretty much do anything!

oh, i might have mentioned that the getting to see all those movies part was not me sneaking away when i was supposed to be sweeping to catch various parts of various ones, but that as an employee i am allowed two free passes a week for either me and a friend or myself twice. and i love my friends, but with the record number of movies i plan on attending in such a short amount of time, it might be more often than not that both those passes are getting used on numero uno here. sorry, guys. i still love you, though!

so, i foresee this all as a good thing that's going to work out. of course, i say that now, but there is always the possibility that in no time flat i'll be coming back here to rant about rude customers, ridiculous hours, and lazy co-workers (or maybe cute ones!), but let's hope not! (except the cute co-worker part :-P )

p.s. sara is gone, and it is so lonely without her! let's hope i'm doing filling in this gap without her justice!

Monday, May 12, 2008

a week without sundrop

All right. I'm leaving super early tomorrow morning and I'm going to Virginia. High up in the mountains where there is no cell phone reception or internet access. Participating in weird Christian rituals like singing with your hands in the air and praying out loud with the words Father God replacing all commas. Just kidding, it's kind of like a big Christian conference and I'm really excited about going.

That said, this is it. This is the week that, in one respect, I've been dreading for several months. It's kind of the precursor for Colombia. I'll be going this week without Sundrop. Not sure how it's going to go. BUT I'm drinking lots extra tonight to make up for it. Evidenced:

I'm sort of bouncing off the walls right now. And the only thing scarier than that face of mine is how dirty my mirror is. I swear it's from brushing my wet hair. Not from, like, sneezing or anything.

Here's my Johnny Depp's cheekbone's impression. It's also my karate/ninja impression.

And this is what I'll look like as the caffeine leaves my system sometime around Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. With headaches ensuing.

Until then, it's all yours Nicole. <3!!


Sunday, May 11, 2008

the lengths to which hippies will go to do hippie things

This week has been the week for crazy weather. I drove home today in rain so heavy I couldn't see the car in front of me at one point, and it definitely hailed a little bit. But I am happy to report to you all that my little car made the 400 mile trip, half or so of it through the rain (which is always when it dies), and when I got back home and turned it off, it started again as soon as I cranked it. So I have a bigger crush than normal on my car right now.

Also, I saw Garden State (all the way through) for the first time tonight, and it was amazing.

But what I really want to say is that my roommate (the Colombian, not the deodorant one) is a crazy hippie. We were standing outside this place called Gumby's, which could be a story in itself because Gumby's is great. They've got this thing called Pokey Sticks. And they're kind of like cheese sticks, but not really. Maybe like pizza without the sauce, and cut up into little rectangles. Deliciousness. Although that's not my story.

So we were standing outside and the weather has been crazy so it was really windy. And while we were waiting for our food, Alicia asked for some styrofoam cups to pour our Sundrop into because she was just that thirsty and couldn't wait. And of course I partook. And when we were waiting and our cups were empty but our hands were full of Pokey Sticks boxes, all of a sudden the wind gusted her cup out of her hand and there it was rolling across the parking lot.

And let me tell you, Alicia was horrorstruck. Horrorstruck. She turned to me with this look on her face like she was going to cry so I said, "Go! Go get it! Run!" And she started running across the parking lot, hands full of pizza boxes and her giant purse thing and so she was kind of waddling but she was running after that thing and it was rolling away and I was picturing her sitting on the couch sipping Sundrop contentedly from it later. And then - then - I see her stomp the cup and shoot her fist in the air and maybe the wind was too loud in my ears, but she could have yelled victory!

What she actually yelled was this:


So here's to chasing styrofoam cups (please everyone note the irony of that - how many centuries does styrofoam take to decompose again?) because I WILL NOT LITTER!


Saturday, May 10, 2008

used-to-being-short-person syndrome

I've discovered something about myself, although at the moment I can't remember exactly what made me realize it. I've known I'm sometimes kind of an awkward person (though, to be fair, I'm not nearly as awkward as I used to be and there are certainly people worse than I am), but I am especially so with people who are smaller than me.

Now, I don't mean people who are younger than me, because they're supposed to be smaller. And I guess it's just because I've always been the smallest and shortest person, so I don't really know how to act around them. It just doesn't make sense to me. That is, unless a person is younger than me, my brain just doesn't think he should be smaller. So it's kind of like how some people don't really know how to act around kids. And I have to keep myself from acting around them the way I might some other little person (and, for me, those are generally child-things),

It's not strange with Nicole, but I think I'm just used to her now. Because I vaguely remember feeling very strange back freshman year when it was just the two of us walking together. Like I should bend my knees very slowly until I'm the very shortest and no one noticed at all. Isn't that a dance move? The elevator?

Also, I'm at my mom's house for the weekend. And the day before I came three tornadoes touched down in this county and the neighboring county. And here, if we ever get tornadoes, they are F0's, but Thursday they were F2's and F3's and flipped over some planes at the airport. And when my friend Antonio and I were driving around last night, we were almost certain we were seeing a wall cloud being lit up by the lightning. It was insane.

And another cool thing about being home - I just got my braces adjusted and they've moved so much just since yesterday and I am hurting so bad. But the cool thing is my mom always hooks me up. I'm definitely on some narcotics right now, and everything is gooooooood.


p.s. when I stood up just now, it took everything else a second to catch up to my height.. teeheehee.

[UPDATE: five minutes of medicine head and then feeling like you're going to throw up for the rest of the night is not gooooood. Never again, never again, never again..]

in regards to the NC people i miss...

...first, most, and foremost would have to be my russian boyfriend. what will i do without seeing him in the wag kitchen every week? or him throwing zucchini at me from across the room? or walking in just when i'm wearing the bamboo asian hat with pink ribbons that has randomly been by our popcorn boxes for several months and was just begging for someone to wear it (which both myself and ryan did)?

who will he come to work just to see? how will he plan his schedule if not around mine? surely this will throw his life into chaos! madness! who knows what he will do! how he'll use that zucchini he has no one to throw at! what a broken man he will surely become. tragic, i tell you, tragic...

if you will, a moment of silence, please, for my russian boyfriend.

greetings from jersey!

hello, lovers! did you miss me? it has been over 2 weeks since my last posting and poor sara has had to hold down the fort all by her lonesome. well, fear not! i have returned after a much too long absence due to crazy amounts of papers, projects, finals, being in what seemed like a constant state of sickness in some form, working every weekend all weekend, and finally, thankfully, packing up my life in NC and moving it back here to NJ for the summer after an incredibly boring 10 hour long drive up the eastern seaboard. that's right, you read that correctly, TEN HOURS.

i'd like to be able to report that other exciting and fabulous things managed to occur in the interim besides those things mentioned above, but as per usual, not really... besides the fact that i'm finally free of the cape harbor hell hole and summer is OFFICIALLY here, there has been little cause for extreme bouts of joy, but that's not to take away from those two things just mentioned, as they were highly anticipated and incredibly freeing as i haven't felt in a very long time.

in original nicole fashion, i have decided not to take summer classes so as to avoid wasting money on gas, having homework, and having a restricted schedule to work the job that i don't have yet. so as of this current date, though i've only been home not even 3 days, summer is shaping up to be a whole lot of lounging around doing not much of anything. and any of you who know, know that's pretty much my life goal, especially as far as summer is concerned. works for me! minus the whole not having a job part, because i actually really do want/need one since a person generally needs money to survive and purchase whatever their heart may desire (or be responsible and pay off student loans...just a thought).

while i can't wait for all my jersey lovers to arrive for some loooongggg overdue hanging out and general seeing of each other after months and months of not, i already miss NC and everyone there. i started missing everything the minute i got on 40 and i wasn't even fully out of wilmington yet! oh, how that place and people have stolen my heart <3

should i not get a job, or even if i do, i have decided to create of list of things i hope to accomplish over the course of the summer as opposed to being that incredibly lazy bum we know i can be and have mentioned earlier i thought about again becoming. so, here is a working version of my summer goals:
  1. get enough sun that i don't have to show people my butt for them to believe i am already tan
  2. eat my weight in ice cream, but manage to successfully keep it off by having a steady work out regime
  3. take more pictures of my crazy, amazing friends
  4. write (and finish) another screenplay and/or short story
  5. do my laundry in a more timely manner as opposed to letting nearly everything i own get dirty so i'm left with only my granny panties and an XXL t-shirt that i forget why i own in the first place until laundry day comes each week (or two)
  6. go to all 31 movies released from now until august that i want to see
what do you think? good plan so far? i thought so, too. who knows, maybe this will inspire each of you to make your own list! good luck, and lemme know how it goes!

Thursday, May 8, 2008

i am a mess-maker

Something about me: I'm a little bit disastrous.

I'm one of those people who, if I'm happy or excited, is just bubbling over with it, full and elated and energetic and unable to hold it all in. Likewise, if I love somebody, I love them all the way, with all of me, as hard as I can, more than what might be considered smart by some. Even when I screw it up, which I tend to do, if I love someone, I love them more than anyone in the world. And when I'm mad or sad, I might as well be Irish. If I'm mad, I'm all fire and yelling until I just run out of it, and when I'm sad, the whole world is falling apart.

I'm passionate, and that's the thing. It's not selective. Disastrous or otherwise.

I say all of that to say I'm kind of a mess-maker. If I go somewhere or do something, chances are something crazy will happen. Like with voting Tuesday. Now, I'd never voted before (although I think I could have locally last year, but I mean for the presidency) and I was pumped. Grabbed my friend Scott, drove him to his district and then we headed toward mine. At this point, it was about 5:30 and polls were open until 7:30. We had two hours. We were fine.

Now let me say one more thing. The church where I was voting at is called - we'll just say - Praise Be To God The Highest Presbyterian. Located at 4501 Wrongsville Ave. We pulled up to the intersection (4500), turned left toward the higher numbers, and pulled into the church on the corner. Which was dead. And locked. And actually called Praise Be to God The Highest Baptist. Two totally different churches we're talking about. Soooo. We circled the block about ten times looking for the church we were suppose to be at, the one that was supposed to be on the corner where the imposter Baptist church was (the church that, by the way, was at 4700). And we did find a Wesleyan church, but not the Presbyterian one.

So we drove home, since Scott didn't have a handy iPhone so we could google the thing, googled it at home, and we were right! The address was correct! Well, after driving all the way back out there (it was about ten til seven at this point), we found the place on the other side of the intersection, more on the intersecting road than the addressed road. Well, forty minutes. At least we'd found the place, finally.

And then it got worse. But to be fair, it was my fault. I wasn't on the list to vote. Apparently you have to change your address when you move, and being the first time voter, I did not know that. So I sat with a lady who had been doing this very thing since around six that morning and whose patience was running very thin. And we about couldn't find me in the system. But finally they did, and I voted, and I am very happy about that.

Plus, the sticker was really neat =)


Tuesday, May 6, 2008

so i've taken up salsa dancing

And let me tell you, it is pretty great - and I am pretty bad at it.

I've actually had a lot of fun with it, learning and all. Plus, I totally get to touch other people's hands, and I know it's weird, but I'm completely in love with hands. Actually, that said, I should be less likely to want to touch a bunch of people's hands just like I wouldn't want to be making out with all those people (since way back when I liked a boy enough to date him, I really liked kissing), but I digress. I just like hands, and every once in a great while someone I'm dancing with will have really wonderful hands and I forget about dancing and get even more off step than I normally am and just feel their hands and the way they fit with mine.

Which totally makes me sound like a freak.

Right, so when I'm not sexually harassing people via hand holding, I'm yelling no se como bailar! as smooth latin dancers pull me onto the floor. Sometimes, I'm kind of like a fridge and really it's just hopeless and embarrassing, but other times I forget that I don't know how and I do really well, considering. So I can't wait to dance in Colombia, although from what my roommate tells me I'll have to learn all over again, but I'm excited. And of the little I can say in Spanish, at least I can tell them I don't know how to dance.

It's completely risky though, I've decided. I need to develop one of those eyes that can pick out the nasty, perverted guys, kind of like a gaydar, because, while a lot of the people are patient and nice, some of them just want to bump and grind and let me tell you, it ain't happenin'. There's gonna be some bumpin' and grindin' of his teeth on the floor when I beat him up. Right hook, duck, swing bam bam. You know.

I've also decided I was born the wrong color. I should be at least three different colors, but alas, I am trapped in the body of skinny white girl who can't dance. But it's, like, fighting its way out of me, cause I'm a gangster and I say giiiirrrrl and I got back.

Aaaaanyway. The real purpose of this post is to say Nicole's leaving today. And we're going to miss her. And I'm going to get a picture and put it on here of me waving goodbye as Nicole pulls onto the open road saying, dirty Jerz, I'm comin' home.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

in memoriam

Nicole is currently dead. She caught some icky frat boy disease, and I'm not sure if she's going to make it. So, in memory of our dear Nicole, I thought I'd post something from work that always reminds me of her.

First, how nice of them! How wonderfully inclusive and politically incorrect! This sign is the greatest thing I've ever seen, and if there were ever a sign made specifically for Nicole and her height, this one is it. Especially since we realized the same day that she is precisely three popcorn bags tall (I'll have to get a picture of that too). Ahaha, sometimes my job is amazing.

Secondly, what is a carbon finger? Does Nicole have one? Would it go away if she had longer legs? And really, I would love to do the math on that ratio. 3:5? How many more times is she stepping?? Isn't that creating more CO2 waste by all the huffing and puffing of whatever percent more she's having to walk for every three normal steps?? Here's what I think: we can reduce waste (time waste, I mean, because clearly we need to be more efficient) by punting her over to the recycle bin.